Partners
by The Soul Cake Duck
Summary: When their partnership began neither Hoshigaki Kisame nor Uchiha Itachi were entirely honest with each other. Itachi grows up in Akatsuki. Kisame deals with his inner sharky nature. Kisa x FemItachi. Slight AU. Crack. Akatsuki spoilers. Bad summary.


Partners

* * *

When the Akatsuki partnership between Hoshigaki Kisame and Uchiha Itachi began neither of them were entirely honest with each other.

At the time Kisame had still been valiantly denying that he had any problems taking a partner who was nearly eleven years younger than himself but just as powerful. While Itachi was content to let Kisame think that his new partner was a quiet, moody, slightly effeminate, pre-teen boy instead of a quiet, moody, pre-teen girl.

Over the first year of their partnership Kisame's quiet resentment was slowly worn away. Itachi was nothing like he expected. Quiet and reserved, the young Uchiha didn't brag needlessly or have any of the pompous arrogance that was sadly usual for one who had reached their level of power.

In the infancy of their partnership Itachi just gave quiet insight and advice, suggesting the best course of action and not expecting to be listened to, she was happily surprised when she realized that Kisame had brains and brawn, unlike so many people she had had to work with before. She unknowingly utilized the quiet strength and authority that had served her well all through her years as an ANBU captain and Kisame found himself deferring to a thirteen-year-old and not minding at all.

By the end of their first year of partnership the two missing ninja had begun to trust each other and form bonds.

By the end of their first year of partnership Kisame had grudgingly admitted to Itachi that he had slightly resented her at the beginning of their partnership. Itachi just nodded in understanding and made a noise of agreement. Kisame had begun to thank his lucky stars that his new partner wasn't stupid or needlessly blabby.

Although he still had no idea whatsoever that Itachi was really a girl.

* * *

During their second year of partnership Itachi began to be well and truly thankful that Kisame wasn't a nosy person, and that she had a ridiculous amount of pain tolerance, because that whole 'period' thing hurt a hell of a lot more than her mother said it would.

And the cramps started when she and Kisame were half-way through a retrieval mission, Itachi had accidentally alerted the guards to their presence when she had exhaled a long breath in hopes of getting her lower abdominal muscles to forgive her and stop contracting so horribly. She made it up to herself by slaughtering every guard she could find as violently as possible.

When they got back to the base Itachi made a bee-line for Konan's room, the Ame kunoichi clearly surprised to see the group's youngest member standing outside her door with what could only be described as a helpless expression on her face, not that Konan knew that Itachi was a girl at that point.

At first Konan had thought that the young Uchiha was just discovering 'his' hormones and was prepared to slam the door right in the little pervert's face when Itachi had pushed past her into the room and shut and locked the door, turning back to Konan and blurting.

"I've started my period and I really need your help." A near-panicked look on the ex-Konoha ninja's face. Konan decided that one of the other Akatsuki members had been playing the kid and said;

"Itachi-san, boys don't have periods." Calmly trying to get the confused youngster out of her hair. She raised an eyebrow when Itachi took of her cloak, the other brow rising to meet its companion when the Uchiha removed her overshirt and calmly stated that '_she was not a boy_', with the proof right before her eyes. Konan stood there for a few seconds, shocked that the newest recruit was really just a little girl when she remembered why Itachi had sought her out in the first place.

So Konan became the first person in Akatsuki to know that Itachi was actually a girl, the older kunoichi was thrilled, but agreed to help keep Itachi's secret, discreetly supplying the Uchiha with various feminine necessities. Whenever Itachi was at base the same time as Konan she held up her end of the bargain and spent most of her time with Konan, being, as the older kunoichi put it, 'Initiated into the Sisterhood', which involved learning how to properly manicure and watching romantic comedies. Itachi felt as though Konan was the big sister she had never had.

By the end of Itachi's second year in the Akatsuki she had a new best friend and most of the other members were convinced that Itachi was gayer than a May pole.

They still hadn't figured out that she was a girl, not even Leader-sama.

* * *

When she was sixteen, Itachi's body decided to develop. Before, she had had an easy time hiding her secret from the rest of Akatsuki. Now it seemed as though her genetics were getting revenge on her, because she was the first Uchiha in living memory with _curves_. She had hoped to grow up and be slender and athletic like her mother, which would make her life as a 'boy' much easier. But no, she was a veritable sexpot, physically at least.

To her eternal shame she had to resort to a Genjutsu seal to hide her 'condition', to conserve chakra, and because, as an illusionist, Itachi knew that subtle changes were the least noticeable and difficult but had the most effect. So, the 'new' Itachi had slender hips and a flat chest but otherwise looked exactly the same.

She could tell the day was coming that she would have to let go of her secret, but she was going to hold onto it as long as he possibly could. Konan-chan had agreed with her choice, annoyed by the trials and tribulations of being the only openly female member of an infamous organization of most constantly-horny missing-nin.

It was also around this time she had discovered her crush on Kisame, she had begun to notice how tall he was compared to her, and how very strong, hefting that big sword around and just having a general aura of power. She found herself staring at his more than was possibly healthy and began to realize that she was in deep trouble now that her hormones had started acting up.

* * *

During the time that Itachi was internally panicking and cursing her body, Kisame was having a very disturbing time as well.

Over the past few years he had noticed slight changes in his younger partner; it was disturbing because he would only be able to sense the changes for a few days before whatever _it_ was somehow disappeared back to wherever _it_ had come from.

Also, Itachi, in the past year or so, had suddenly become very appealing to the decidedly sharky part of his nature. The ex-Kiri-nin had a hard time explaining it, even to himself, but for some reason Itachi now registered on his senses as 'mate' material.

Kisame was afraid, because if he recalled correctly, neither he nor his 'inner shark' were into men. Samehada sent him comforting vibes, but had the definite lack of tact in informing him that Itachi's chakra was very sweet. He shuddered at the thought and wondered not for the first time why his family had a sword that could talk as its heirloom.

* * *

The entire mess came to a head when Itachi was eighteen and Kisame was twenty nine, in their fifth year as partners.

They had been in Konoha, trying to capture the Kyuubi's Jinchuuriki, when they had been attacked by Konoha ninja and one of the Sannin. They had escaped, with minimal injury, back to the inn that they had been staying in, when Itachi had collapsed from chakra exhaustion caused by overuse of the Sharingan.

Kisame had stripped off Itachi's cloak and laid his partner on one of the room's beds when he had noticed the younger's shirt ride up slightly. But it was not the sight of Itachi's toned tummy that interested the Kiri-nin, although his sharky side was enjoying that, it was the simple Genjutsu seal that was extremely prominent on the pale skin of his partner's tummy.

Now Kisame was not the most brilliant ninja in the world, but he was far from the stupidest ninja either. He knew what the seal was and had a fair idea of how to undo it; one didn't team up with a Genjutsu Master and not pick up a few tricks along the way.

So Kisame did, and there was a short spike of chakra as it released and a poof of smoke and then he found himself confronted with, what he assumed was the true form of his partner.

The sharky ninja sat down heavily on the other bed and tried not to look, but that was impossible, so he resigned himself to studying his partner's feminine body. Long dark hair was silky and gleamed in the light, a fine bone-structure and light musculature was covered by soft creamy skin that was so pale it seemed to glow, a figure which had before been flat and slender was now rounded and curving.

His partner was a knockout.

Samehada empathized that at least he wasn't gay. Kisame's sharky nature had decided that Itachi would be a very good mate, and if it had been anything more than a deeply-seated set of urges and responses, Kisame was sure it would have been saying '_I told you so'_ and dancing around in glee that it was right.

* * *

Itachi's eyelids fluttered and then opened, she slowly sat up and looked around. She noticed Kisame sitting and staring at her and then looked down at herself, and then she looked back at Kisame. Damn, she had been hoping to get to twenty before telling him.

* * *

Kisame watched as Itachi awoke, noticed the situation and then flushed a deep red, pretty dark eyes looked at him as the flush spread across her cheeks and down her neck and up to her hairline. He decided that this would be an optimal opportunity to ask.

"So why do you hide that you're actually a girl?"

Itachi's blush darkened; she secretly cursed pale skin for turning red easily.

"I've always had poor self-image." She answered truthfully, Kisame raised an eyebrow. Poor self-image? One of the most deadly people in the world hid the fact that she was a complete hottie because she had poor self-image? It rather confused him, but he had also had to deal with his own fair share of self-esteem issues when he was younger because he looked like a shark, so he didn't question it.

"So that's why you've spend so much time with Konan." He said sagely. Itachi nodded.

They sat in awkward silence for awhile, the both of them not really sure what to say.

"Um…" Itachi began, Kisame looked at her, "…I've harbored secret affections for you for some time now." Itachi was resolutely staring at the bedspread when she said this.

Kisame took his turn to blush a deep violet, he blurted:

"My inner shark wants you as its mate." Itachi looked up and they both blushed again when they met each other's eyes.

"I…mean, I've secretly really liked you also." Kisame said quickly, hoping to recover from his mistake, he had found that most people began to look at him a bit funny when he mentioned his inner shark. Itachi blinked, then she got up and walked over to Kisame before tentatively packing him on the lips.

Kisame stood up, wrapped his arms around Itachi and really kissed her, then they proceeded to lose all their clothes and make some sweet, sweet, sharky, psycho-ninja love.

Because of Kisame's love, Itachi stopped doubting herself and went back to the Akatsuki base as a woman. Who then proceeded to scare the living hell out of the other members who had been convinced that she was a gay man.

Itachi and Kisame continued on as the most successful partnership and Akatsuki and they never looked back.

* * *

The end

* * *

Waaah! Where do I get these ideas?

Anyways, this was probably my most random story to date. Thankfully it is but a one-shot, and now that the idea is out of my head I'll hopefully get back to updating my other projects. This is really long, though. My longest one-shot so far, Yay!

Itachi is a bit of a late bloomer.

Instant cookies for all those who actually make it to the Author's Note.

Does anyone actually read the Author's Note, by the way? I mean, I'd hate to be wasting a valuable ramble if you guys aren't going to read it.

Flamers…I think flamers are the least of my worries…Haha, that's right, I don't really care…in fact, I'll take your flame as a compliment a keep writing anyway.

Cake-chan


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